I think I belong here #2

[praying_in_GA]

Have you ever watched the younger generation w/their phones and texting? The equipment is attached to their ears and their fingers. She is 21 and that generation is all about texting. You can't be sure that she is the only one that he is texting. He may have a number of new friends that he's in communication with.

Yes, the crisis is all about emotions and right now, he's gone back in time to that "younger" age to find what he thinks he missed out on.

Whether it is an emotional or physical affair, they both have to die a slow death and at their hands. Right now, she's stroking his ego and showing him a good time and there is no history w/them, i.e., only the present. You represent responsibility, accountability and "history". You know him like a book and can spot when he's not himself. But, some time in the future, he may turn back to you for that safe place to land. Time will tell on that and when it will happen.

The one thing that you must remind yourself each and every time you compare yourself to the girl is that you are the prize. She will never be able to replace you because you have the wisdom and strength that has held your family together. She doesn't have that w/him, i.e., it's just play time. Again, as a repeated reminder, this is all about him...not about you and you need to remember this.

Keep the focus on you and your family. Life is far too short not to live each day to the fullest.

Job, as usual, you hit the nail on the head here. He is going back to his missed dating time. See, I was his first girlfriend. His first kiss. His first...everything. I have often wondered when he would get curious as to what he has missed and go looking. He was 22 when we started dating, 26 when we got married, 28 when we had our first child, 29 when we had our second....He went from never dating to married and kids. Now he chooses a 21 year old to entertain him during this time in his life. And he is getting affirmation from more 20-somethings in his classes. He loves to tell me what nicknames they have for him and how they fawn all over him.

I think it is interesting how open I am about his friend. I told him tonight I know they are in the infatuation stage right now and he wants to spend time with her. I remember that stage....

Thank you for the boost. I DO need to start looking at myself as a prize. I have very low self confidence and self esteem.

I love my family and I love my husband. I just want my happily ever after...and that may not be with him afterall.