[BrightFuture]

Just received and reply from H to my e-mail about car insurance. It only took a week for him to respond. He apologized for the late reply and said that he didn’t check his e-mail for a while. Then he says “If in the future something needs paid quick please give me a call.” What????? How long is he planning this kind of future? Am I reading it wrong?

Is he just using me? Silly me thinking that he cannot cut that last tie. Am I delusional? Is it what everybody (my family and friends) are telling me about? That he is gone gone, and just using me when it is convenient for him.

Then he gives me the reason for calling him instead of e-mail: “You know I am working towards not having a computer ( and I'm serious).” I don’t even know what to think about this one. It started a few years ago, even before his father became ill, I would say at least 4 years ago, when he started saying that he didn’t like all this electronics, and if could live without a cell phone and a computer, he would. A couple of time his laptop almost flew out of the window, when H tried to do something and “computer” didn’t cooperate. He got himself a smart phone last summer, but then switched back to a regular phone, because he was frustrated with the smart phone.

But… Is he delusional? How someone could live without a computer these days. I know he just paid his truck registration online. He orders things online. He will need to communicate about his work. What is he thinking? I could understand this when we were together, because he could always relay on me. I guess one of the requirements for his “perfect” woman is that she should have a computer. Easy, eh…

This just confirms how stubborn H is. Once he has an idea in his head, he is going to pursue it until he achieves it, gets burned or gets bored. What is it going to be for this idea of not having a computer? Or, he might be in a deeper crisis than it seems. Anyone knows any examples like that? When a person wants to disappear from the world (obviously he cannot, because he still has to work)? Well, except from his drinking buddies and fun.

At the end of the e-mail he asks if I have found work. So nice of him. At least my little validation in my e-mail didn’t scare him away.