Praying, Matt, I think you both need to establish FIRM boundaries. Right now, things are very easy for your spouses. You need to set the tone for things, do not allow your want of your marriage to succeed be a roadway into the cake-eating behavior. Part of the dynamic of the MLCer is the ability to hold on to both worlds. Cut the rope on the safe world a bit and show them a piece of how life will really be without you and your support. MLCers count on you wanting to stay married, that's why these little carrots are dropped now and again. Establish firm boundaries, and protect yourself financially at all costs!
