Yes.. my posts are 95% about him, because I work soooooo much with him and there is soooo much to say about that. Posting random things about my life seem pointless... but, I can see why you want me to do so... its about focusing more on me... so, will try:
1) came to decide today that I need to embrace being single. As much as I hate the term and the lifestyle... I need to experience it for what it is.... or at least try.. its for education and my growth. SO, without ego..... Xbf and I were at one of our pick up locations and one of our associates made a joking comment about "my husband", I was quick to reply laughingly "I don't have a husband", then he corrected himself "ok, your bf", I laughed and said, "but, I don't have a bf".... I was being playful, but accepting what I was saying and speaking the truth. Normally, I would have let this guy think we were married, and have been happy at that.
2) later in the day, Xbf asked if I wanted him to bring down coffee to our lot. As much as I wanted "social" time, I really didn't want a coffee.... and realized that I would have only said "yes", for the social time..... so, when he asked, I replied "no thanks, I'm beyond coffee".... realizing that I was much more in the mood for a beer. He came with coffee for himself, but I didn't hang around much for the social part, I got involved with work stuff instead. Popping in and out of his coffee moment.
3) an old bf/friend was texting with me today (we do so regularly and he knows my entire situation and has been helpful)... so, I invited him out for a beer/snacks. This old bf is getting married in June (safe). I was in the mood to be "out" in public and he was in the mood for a beer. He had helped me a few weeks ago deciding what was fair in business division. We had a laugh... lots of laughs actually as we walked down memory lane. We also discussed the sexual tension between Xbf and myself and he helped me to put things back into perspective and respect myself.
It was nice to be "out" in public amongst other people. I really need to get OUT more..... as much as I do go out... I need more, I guess. My world is still way too small....thus making him (Xbf) seem like the only guy available.... therefore I behave like he is THE ONLY Guy !!!
M:46 H:49 T:20yrs myD:22 H distant summer/12 H sleeping in b'ment: Nov/12 BD: Dec 2/12 asked me begin to move end of Jan/13 moved Jan 7/13 (left my stuff) "agreed" to "working on r" Mar 3/13(lipservice!)
