Roller coaster and then some

[daring]

AJ thanks for the welcome! I see you so many times supporting others to stick with their initial decision and that is such a valuable thing to do when we all feel so up and down.

I agree with you there is a lot of hope, and Amen to physician heal thyself! This situation, though not the way I would have liked it to happen, has given me the opportunity to get back to the real me. The one willing to be vulnerable and take chances and be authentic every day. My user name is actually from a book I am reading by Brene Brown called Daring Greatly. Wonderful insight into how numbing bad feelings also results in numbing joy and connectedness. I so identify with the " change anything" to please your spouse initially. But then I realized that what I was doing was going back to "ME" where joy and passion and connection are not inhibited by walls of fear.

I decided at the beginning of this I truly believe we are meant to be together. We have a depth of relationship and connection that is greater than many. That's probably why we also hurt so much when things are not right. If it doesn't work out in the end, it's not going to be for lack of effort on my part. But limbo is extremely hard for me right now.

Thanks for the tip on Raine's threads- I will definitely do that. I have been reading through TakeVowsSerious' thread and have seen Raine comment frequently. Seeing the hope in others sitch even when the signs are subtle helps me see the same in my own relationship.

Thanks for being such a great rssource to so many!