She's returning home for in house separation!

[gogofo]

So with all this information what are you going to do about yourself?

[Oxford1]

Work on myself .
And that I must must protect my boys and show them what its like to be a man!! That is whats most important , what my two sons think and know about their role as a man and how to handle women who try to manipulate them.

[MrBond]

"how to handle women who try to manipulate them."

Okay, I'm curious. So how are you teaching them to treat women who "manipulate" them without sounding resentful against your W (who just happens to be their mother)?

[Oxford1]

I am not "teaching" so,to,say or talking bad about their mother.

I am just trying to not let her manipulate me.

Kind of what I discussed with the divorce coach.

This is what I was,going to write:
And that I must must protect my boys and show them what its like to be a man!! That is whats most important , what my two sons think and know about their dad!! (its none of my business about what the think of their mother)


And it was changed and corrected by a woman to what I posted.

[MrBond]

"protect my boys and show them what its like to be a man!!"

Okay, so what does that mean? What is "being a man" mean?

"(its none of my business about what the think of their mother)"

To a certain degree it is your business because she is still their mom. While you can't control HOW they feel, you can control how they interpret her actions. If you don't teach them how this, they will carry on their own feelings about their mom into their own relationships. You can minimize that.

[Oxford1]

I just feel like when I tried to protect her,they'd questioned why, and I refuse to poison my sons againsT their mom, she's in a bad place right now and I care for her too much.

In terms of being a man, I feel they need to stick up for themselves and not get walked all over buy their future wives. But they also have a duty to be a good husband and a she secure supporting spouse. Also a real mN does not do what their moms AP has done.

Years ago I met a,woman at work, I was married about five years, at first she was a good friend but then she wanted to hold my hand sit on my lap, etc, she was sending me cards. But she was recently married , and we were married about seven years. My judgement came into play as mulch as I was falling for her. I , me, stopped it, I told her that she's a Newley wed and sometimes after you get married doubt sets in. I also pointed out I was married and loved my wife, hence why I never held her hand, and told her not to sit on my lap. ,but then I said even if I was not married , I feel its inappropriate for a man to start a relationship,with a married woman no matter how unhappy she is or how much she's the initiator. She told me she thought she loved me...I told her that she was mistaken and needed to direct that love at her husband.

I left the company and she was one of the reasons, I have no idea what happened to her.

That to me is part of being a Man!

[MrBond]

"I feel they need to stick up for themselves and not get walked all over buy their future wives. But they also have a duty to be a good husband "

I'm not exactly sure how you plan to define this. You just teach them RESPECT.

[Oxford1]

Well that's kind of what I meant. I will tell you S21 is loaded full of respect.

S15 is very respectful of his teachers, people he meets, but I have been working with his therapist on respect at home. He did tell my wife that he was super angry that her AP said he could be a better father than me, I don't know what he said but she told me as did s15 that she started to cry. She was proud of what he said about me.

But he sometimes due to anxiety will lash out verbally and he nasty to his mother and me, and that is unacceptable . His therapist says he says word for word phrase for phrase the exact things to me that his mother would say to me.

All he tells his mother is she's ugly, and he expressed in therapy he does not mean physically, it's what he has known she's sone to me.

He was the one that first for suspicious last July of what she was up to.

[Oxford1]

Began taking down pictures of the fateful Israel trip. I also am putting away all the wedding photos.

[Oxford1]

Biggest issue is I know I was exhausted yesterday, but I got very little accomplished. I did not even do any readings.

I need to really reestablish my focus.. It's effecting my work as well.