However, now she's saying it's because she thinks she has some personal growth that she needs to accomplish and her life needs to go in a different direction, and she believes that can't happen if she stays married.
I know I'm not supposed to be focusing on my W, but this has stuck with me ever since she said it...more so than anything else she's said. Mainly because it's the only thing she's said that hasn't made some kind ofsense to me... What does it even mean? Is this just something that some WAWs say? Is it part of a typical script?
Do I ask for clarification of what exact "personal growth" and "different direction" she's talking about (yeah, pretty sure I know what DBing says about asking those questions). I didn't say anything when she said it to me last night, I just validated her feelings... But it has been turning over in my mind. Her list of complaints, my flaws and the various ways I've fallen short in the marriage, those all make sense to me. But the personal growth/different direction stuff is just a real WTF for me. Especially because I addressed some similar type issues in my IC earlier in our marriage, and my therapist always had the perspective that 99.9% of the time there is no growth that can happen outside of the marriage that can't also happen within it.
H: 43 W: 37 M: 11 years T: 12 years S: 11 D: 8 ILYBINILWY, "I want to move out" and "I want a divorce": 3/23/14 MC started: 9/22/14 Affair and past infidelity discovered: 9/26/14 Piecing: 10/20/14
