Wife moved out to be with her Tour Guide Lover

[labug]

you two have been caught up in this twisted, unhealthy dynamic for so many years (bickering back and forth, control issues, mean-spiritedness, each of you fighting for your "inch of ground" on every issue) that it's not really HER you are missing. It's the sick, unhealthy DYNAMIC that you can't let go of.

That explains why you rush to see every call, voice mail, text, whatever. You can't seem to live an ordinary life without the drama that you BOTH create.

Until you do some deep soul-searching and self-reflection to discover why you are so addicted to this poisonous relationship and these very unhealthy interactions, this will go on and on. Why do you crave negative attention from her? Is it because ANY attention is better than NO attention?

Normal relationships do not look like this. At all.

The above left out the physical violence which is a huge factor.

I found this in your early pages. What are you doing about soul searching and healing you?

You really should be less concerned about what she's doing and pour your energy into you and your kids. Were they witness to the physical violence? Is that how they've learned to handle conflict? That's why I say you have a scary dynamic for everyone involved.