Starting a new post. Once I figure out how to add old thread I will. How do I do this?
Been a hectic day. We saw some of my family and he asked if they were upset with him. Duh. I just ignored the conversation as I could see it leading to a fight. Had to listen to family not understand why I am standing. Um..bc god married me and I don't quit. Ad if mlc was not enough he us showing mental issues too. In sickness and health...right?
He is not sure how to make of my 180 and detaching. He keeps asking if I am upset about something. Which makes me chuckle...duh he wants a divorce. normally I am first one to start conversations, but follow his lead for what we are doing. He says he is waiting until his work gets settled for the divorce. I think he won't do it now because if it goes to court it will be nicer to help him out. He got mad when I said divorce does not matter it is just a paper. I guess he does not like me saying off the wall things like him. I refer to it as delusional land.
I still am crying at drop of hat. I don't cry in front of him though. I probably need more antidepressants. This is so hard, I would not wish this crap in my worst enemy. I look at my girls and don't understand how he could leave them. It is obvious he does not want trial separation, just divorce. He says us being in separate rooms is our separation. I caught him watching porn last night, so i found one more thing against religion. Ha ha I thought murder was only one left.
Please send words of encouragement or any ideas as every moment has been struggle today. My therapist gave me new books to read on mlc and bipolar and personality disorder. I am waiting a library to get them in from neighboring library. Did any of your spouses have a mental breakdown or nervous breakdown?
