Things have been rolling along, I've been focused on myself as much as possible with GAL and detaching. As well as my physical fitness. I feel great, and I'm trying to knock things off the home clean up list. It's tough with my kids being so little, but whenever I get a chance, it gets done
My W has been acting pretty strange lately. Seems she is stuck between what she wants to do, and committing. She told a friend she isn't sure what she is doing. I'm obviously confused, trying to detach and move on.
She doesn't want to end her A, and she seems to want to be around the house more, but I don't allow that. Is she trying to figure out how she feels? I just don't see any good coming from her A, and can't see how she will ever change. I know that I should mind read, but it's hard not to look for little signs. This is my challenge to avoid.
Apparently, she was online at the house, left the window open, and I unfortunately looked when I got home. I need a 2x4 to stop this. As witnessing real time sexting between your W and the OM is healthy in any way. I'm still trying to forget what I saw
There is a lot of concern and interference from her family. I am not involved in this in any way. I don't save her from this, as I feel it's her own mess she has created
Probably what I am trying to do the most, and struggling with the most, is making sure that I validate her interests , but continue to detach and do what I think is LRT. I am interested if she tells me about her work, but I don't ask. I rather make sure I listen. Several texts go by from her with delayed or no response from me.
The D has not been discussed in detail at all. Out of the blue, my W brought up that if she was to come back, she would be number 5 on the needs list at our house, which was a realistic concern pre A. She also told me she right now has no interest in sharing a bed with me etc. Had to bite my tongue, and I just told her that I think there would have to be a lot of work that was done before that was even a possibility, as that I understood that was how she felt. I didn't offer anything else about how I felt. Good move or bad move?
I'm just going to keep going with my activities and keep working. This is going to take a long time. Will be interesting to see how I feel if /when I reach a point where I decide what I would actually like to do. For example, do I really want to be M to someone that has treated me like this.
