I am not perfect and yes there have been some issues in the past which hang over us. I had a problem with gambling for a few years but that has been dealt with, at least I haven't gambled for a few years. She said at the beginning of all of this that it was to do with my age ( I am 50 she is 32) and that she no longer found me attractive. The OM was 8 years her junior and a very attractive guy who could have got just about any girl he wanted. He didn't want her apart from the sex so she basically put everything on the line for some fun. She has now started to use the gambling as an excuse now I get that she needs to find reasons but it still doesn't excuse her behaviour at the moment. I'm sure that had an effect on her but we spent months dealing with it and getting professional help and she made a 100% commitment to me and our marriage and I have never let her down since. I suppose if I am honest I have focused so heavily in never going back there that I probably neglected her needs etc. That may well have been a contributing factor but I can still say I honestly didn't see it coming as we had moved on so much from it and our lives were really starting to move in a very good direction. Something changed last Nov when I turned 50, she said she didn't like it and although she had always prided herself in not thinking about the age gap it had all of a sudden become an issue. But all of this still doesn't explain how she could change from being a loving and dedicated mum to some sort of wild child overnight. And I can assure you that before this all started things were pretty good between us, yes I obviously neglected her in some way that I didn;t realise but surely we could have spoken about it. She has also always maintained that I was never meant to find out about this affair and that if I hadn't we would most likely still be together.
