Need help saving my family - part 10

[ericmsant2]

Scorp7

One of the things that DB and my friends here taught me was….

Not to believe the bullchit I was telling myself.

I gave my W six months to try to work things out. I do not want to file for D, I do want to R. To ensure my kids have their father I needed to file for D, that is the only reason I am doing it.

Separate YOUR M from being a DAD. She took the kids – you did nothing. Period. As for you NOT wanting a D. Let me use YOUR words.

My L had talked about filing an interim custody order as well.

As for you NOT wanting to file for a D….

I needed to file for D first.

Do you mean to tell me that… you could not file the motion for custody BEFORE you filed for a D? Honestly, I find that hard to believe. So if you tell me Yes you could have filed for custody and waited on the D…can you understand why I would say that YOUR actions do not match YOUR words? Oh…and FTR, I am not suggesting that you should NOT divorce your W. If it was me, the minute she took the kids 4 hours a way, would have been enough – that just me though.

My L advised that it was best to wait a week or two for my W's response to the D papers first.

Quick story….MY L advised me NOT to leave the martial home. After 2 years of living with my ex, I told my L …”fu*k it – I am going to do what I need to do”. Now, FTR, I am very close to my L, we actually still meet for drinks and dinner every so often. Know what she said to me afterwards….. Eric, I’m not sure how you managed to stay in the house for 2 years, I was happy that you finally left”. So Scorp7….sometimes YOU need to DRIVE the bus. Let me ask you a question….who is the parent to YOUR kids? You or YOUR attny?

I asked my L her opinion of what would be best to ensure I have no less than half time with my kids and she advised based on that.

Then listen to YOUR attny – just remember….at the end of the day, she ain’t living your life. She will get paid and move on to the next client – REGARDLESS of the outcome of YOUR case.

FTR, I do not doubt that you love your kids. I actually believe that YOU believe you are doing everything you can. The issue I see, is that YOU do not see what a lot of others are trying to point. It is a pattern in your responses to your W, a pattern of how you appear to live your life.

Can you see how your response come across?

Many of us have been EXACTLY where you are

It's very easy to sit back and with all the info you have now look at things that happened before and say you messed up here, and there etc etc etc.

AND THIS ^^^^ is the knowledge and LIFE experiences that everyone is trying to get you to see.

I do, but to insinuate I'm not doing everything I can to have my kids with me is BS and fairly insulting.

Words like “everything” “Never” “always”….have different meanings to others.

“everything” to me…meant knocking on my w door and bringing my kids home – regardless of what the law, or my W said.

I guess I am different. Another quick example….if someone breaks into my house, I am pulling out my 9MM and shooting them. Period. It is against the law in my state. Apparently, I cannot even shoot them even if they shoot me. My point is…that I believe in following the “spirit” of the law….not just the “letter”.

You do not have an agreement on custody. In my mind, that means that you can do whatever you want with the kids – even bring them home.

It may cost more in legally fees in the long run…but once again…that is how I define EVERYTHING.

That's just me.

It aint just YOU Wonka.