[BrightFuture]

Job, thanks. You always have a way to give some encouragement.

Yes, you are right, it is in the culture where I’m from. The kids are expected to take care of the parents. But it also depends on the particular family. My sister’s H’s father moved to this country on his own with the family and is fully supporting himself, not relaying on his son. My parents didn’t have to deal with their respective parents at all. They didn’t have to live with their parents and they didn’t have to take care of them. My Mom never wanted to live with her parents or in-laws.

I tried to get my parents to move here a few years ago, so they could get some work hours in order to get some retirement benefits and medical coverage. But they didn’t want to do it. They didn’t want to learn the language, they didn’t want to work, they didn’t want to live on their own in their own place… I cannot have them to come to live with me because I have no means to support them. They would not get any pension benefits, I would have to pay for medical coverage, for food, for everything. I would also have to pay for any kind of assistance or day care. I would also have to make all the arrangements for them in everyday life, because they don’t speak the language and they use it as an excuse all the time. Even if we split the expenses with my sister, it is a lot to handle.

They are doing OK where they live. But, they don’t give up the idea that then need to move in with one of us. I wish I could win a lottery, so I could buy them a house, hire a sitter and a personal driver to take them places like shopping, etc. Did I mention that they do not drive?

You are right, H is still floating and is probably quite comfortable with everything. It is just the fact that he keeps removing stuff from my house makes me think that he is still determined in his decision. I think the reality didn’t hit him hard enough just yet. He thinks that he could maintain this joint business, be on the joint car insurance policy, have mail coming to my house (he hasn’t not re-directed his Playboy magazine by the way) and at the same time behave like a single man. I think that if he would have an OW, he would realize quickly that this would not work. I don’t think OW would be happy with him keeping any kind of contact or joint things with me. I think this is exactly what he is looking for, a woman who would be OK with all that and still love and trust him unconditionally.

I will wait for the answers… Especially when it is a good time to have a conversation with H and put some kind of end to things. Now is not a good time for that. I just wish that there are no more surprises (like on that weekend in Mexico) any time soon. I’m exhausted. I need to regroup.