Because Wonka is wrong in this case. To be fair, in 99% of his responses to me, he's been right. smile

Thanks for your comments, all.

I hope you're putting in context that W expressed her desire to move VERY slowly, and date maybe once a week until fall - so, by her own express statements there would be no way we'd be going on a vacation or doing anything romantic. I did make an assumption but what other assumption would you make than a statement like that?

Also, there is a level of "something" wrong - when W can't calculate in her own mind that the primary reason there haven't been nice vacations is because of her spending; almost literally without stopping. She also went on a nice cruise to the Bahamas with her mom last year - I wasn't invited, and I didn't pout about not getting to do nice things.

I think there are two levels here: one involves pretty normal marital issues like W could be calmer, control her emotions, be more forgiving more quickly - I could be more sensitive, try to think more before I speak, maybe buy her flowers to make her feel special. To me, these are normal.

What's NOT normal is to react to the news a dad is taking his kids on vacation (like he's done the last 12-13 years) with cursing, and F-bombs, and name calling, and storming out of a restaurant, and ending a marriage - THAT is a level that is just even beyond most WAS, in my mind.

And, I'm simply journaling to myself - DBing won't work on my W, but it has done wonders for me. Her ridiculous reactions are sort of a side-show now in my life.

I have a new job that is awesome, still GALing several times a week, getting closer with my kids, have gotten way ahead financially, paid off almost all debt except for my house, reconnected with extended family. I am calm, respond much more slowly and carefully (read some of my early posts!). I am more patient with my kids and really everyone.

I'm very happy, I don't flip back and forth, and I really am comfortable.