I think I belong here #2

[TL72*]

Great advice Job.
It is hard to detach when they're still in the home, but detaching is a must. You should allow yourself some time every day if necessary for grieving, just try and do it somewhere alone but at least that way you get it out. Drive somewhere and cry in your car if you have to, go for a walk or a run, I would cry in the shower, and walk for 30 minutes to try and work out that pain. Just allow yourself a certain amount of time for a pity party and then pray for strength every day, there's nothing you can do to change or fix this and it's not your fault. The only things you can control are you. Make changes in yourself for you. Make plans for your birthday on your own and with your kids, my exH completely forgot my birthday and yes it stings. No expectations. He's going to be a jerk for awhile, they don't just snap out of this. I'm trying to control my own feelings and not allow him to be some sort of puppet master. He only cares about himself right now. It's up to you to go on as if he will never come back. Life will go on. The sun will come up each day. Time will keep ticking. There are a lot of blessings in your life and a lot of good things about you. Journal and list good things about yourself and list the things you won't miss about him. List your many blessings. Take it day by day.