Wife moved out to be with her Tour Guide Lover

[gogofo]

Oxford1, I understand feeling left behind and unsupported by the forum. When I first joined I was in a panic and felt I was in a race against time. I felt that my next move was going to be life or death for my M.

I was wrong and my panic slowly subsided. The only thing that made my panic subside was working on myself.

Use the time between comments on your thread to work on yourself. Be introspective, look at yourself and find what you like and don't like; not what your wife likes and dislikes. Read other threads on here that have people in similar situations. Even though they were not specific to me, I have learned just as much from other people's situations, their actions, and advice people gave to them.

You need to do your work, no one else can do it for you.

Finally you need to work on detaching. You cannot control the OM's actions, your wife's actions or anyone else's so why would you let their actions control your feelings? I understand this is easier said than done and detachment does not come to you over night. But it will never come if you do not work on it. A suggested reading that put it in different words that helped me is the Livestrong website article on detachment. Google "Livestrong detachment" and read it.

Keep working on yourself and try not to think about anything else. Remember that this is a marathon not a sprint. The time you have should be seen as a gift.