mileigh4, I'm so sorry that you didn't know a lot about MLC, but what he's done is pulled the wool over your eyes when he insisted on a separation and then the both of you agreed to a 6 month separation. You thought it was temporary...he didn't. He didn't have the backbone to tell you it was going to be longer.
He pulled the old poor me and it's too far to travel to work and he wouldn't have two parking spaces, etc. That is really a bunch of bs. He played on your kind heart and he got what he wanted. Trust me, if you had really pushed him out, he would have found some place and he wouldn't have stayed at his father's for very long because of the inconvenience. He didn't want his life turned upside down to move. He didn't care that you and your son's lives were about to be turned upside down and quite frankly, I don't like it when they use the children as an excuse to get what they want. They will use every excuse in the book to play the spouse and the spouse thinks that if they give them what they want, they'll come back home...very few do that. The more you give them, the more they want/take.
I know you've got some major decisions to make here, but no matter what you decide, your child will need some counseling. You've given him 6 months to get his act together and he's not going to change any time soon and he's going to turn the ugly mlc monster on and you know what? Pick up the sword and shield and stand your ground. He's nothing more than a big bully who wants his way. It's time you took matters into your hands and do what is right for you and your child. It's time to move back home...right where you belong. If he's not happy, he can pack his sh@t up and move out. I'm sure his father would welcome him w/open arms. Besides, it would be rent free, plenty of parking and yes, he would have more money for fuel that way.
Here's another thing to think about...if you are paying rent on an apartment, why are you helping with the mortgage? You do realize that if it comes down to divorce, he's going to try to get everything he can and leave you and your son w/very little? I think I would have to start slipping up a bit on helping with the mortgage and if he says anything, point out the fact that you are paying rent elsewhere and yes, your mailing address is at your new address. It's time to smoke this guy out and see just what his plans are. From where I'm sitting, he's going to continue just as he has for the last 6 months and why should he be concerned about you and your son? He's gotten what he wanted, the house and yes, you possibly helping with the expenses of the home while living elsewhere. Time to rock his boat and rattle his cage a bit.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
