You will get there, Mama. Your sitch is so new, and you are on such a fast track. Grieving is hard work. Allow yourself to get through it at your own pace.
I have decided I am going to pack up all of H's stuff that he left here, and put the boxes in the garage for him. There was a time, not that long ago, that the thought of that would have made me so sad, because it was like admitting that he isn't coming back. Now I feel like it will help me to move forward.
Look back on your sitch and you will see how far you have come. It's not linear, but you will keep growing. Hang in there.
(((MamaB)))
P.S. I live in Denver, so I can give your H a swift kick in the groin if you'd like!
me: 44 XH: 42 M 11 years D10 and S8 Bomb drop 9/27/13 D final 7/1/14