Hi everyone, I am hoping someone here can help me as I don't know where to turn. My wife and I knew each other from High School and briefly dated but nothing serious (that was '97ish). Fast forward to 2008 and we start talking. At this point she has two daughters T was 7, K was 3. Shortly after we seriously start dating and I have met the girls and spent time with them and enjoy my time with them all, she gets pregnant with our twin boys. Thing were rough, money tight, and I sometimes felt like walls were closing in. Couple fights here, couple fights there but we love each other and our blended family, so we proceed to get married in 11. Now it was around August 13 and she unexpectedly throws me out because I yell and get upset at stupid things. I spend a couple weeks at my parents but I was a mess and spent most my time curled up in a ball. After about 3 weeks my wife asks me to come back home. I jump at the chance to show that I can fix myself and dive headfirst back into my marriage. My wife starts nursing school in Jan 14 and becomes reclusive and starts staying out late with her classmates. One night she didn't come home until 9am the next morning. I sit on the couch while she confesses that she doesn't have the energy to work on our marriage anymore. I get upset and make typical mistakes. She is in the process of moving out and I get to sit here every day while my wife is ripping my children from me. Last night Step Daughter K, tells me that she doesn't want to move and that wife is saying bad things about me to her friends.. I.E. I'm a huge A** and I make wife's life miserable. So I tell Step Daughter that we just need to show mom love and support. I asked wife today to please not speak bad of me in front of kids. Wife blows up saying she would never. I tell her what Step daughter said and now she is calling her daughter a liar and storms off. Wife is now taking step daughter to in-laws so she doesnt have to see her.
I am sorry you are in such a difficult and painful situation. I hope you are getting some professional support. The DB coaches are fantastic in helping you figure the best way of how to deal with your situation and what will be best for you and your children. Take good care.
Karen, Resource Coordinator The Divorce Busting Center 303-444-7004 karen@divorcebusting.com
Give me a call if you'd like to schedule an appointment to speak with a Divorce Busting® Coach.
I am getting support from a counselor and we have attended marriage counseling. The main issue I have with marriage counseling is that it is a female counselor and I get to sit in a chair while these two validate each other about everything horrible I have ever said or done for about 45 minutes. The last 10 minutes is usually me trying to speak up or finally get a word in and instead I get stepped over or told that I'm over-reacting by them both. I asked my wife if we can attend a different marriage counselor but she insists she likes this lady and won't go anywhere else. So I have two choices, 1 quit attending and really kill my chances for marriage, or 2 sit there and deal with it..... On another note, my wife moved out last Friday after signing a year long lease. Took almost everything out of the house, left messes everywhere , and has stopped wearing her wedding ring. My heart hurts and I miss my best friend and wife.
