Spouse tried I didn't, now opposite

[whytry]

We have been married 10+ years, have children, always had issues from day one with first child being born before marriage. We both worked hard to make a beautiful family and survived knowing each of us would never give up. I struggled the last few years while S did everything possible to keep our family together for our entire marriage and really showed me what true love is during my departure from reality. Now I'm the best I've ever been and S decided it's too late. How do I rekindle S love when I have so much to give now and more than I ever dreamed possible. I know I don't deserve and S would rather I die, but truly have come out of my shell and prospered into loving, affectionate person that is willing to give my all for the love of my life. I was late figuring out what I want by a mere few weeks and have now lost everything.