Hope, re: your H working on his R with his sister, I will share what my IC told me.
Background: right around the time my H started to "change", he cut off contact with his D16. She hurt his feelings and he declared he was done with her. (MAJOR red flag to me, but there was no talking him out if it). This is how he has handled all of the significant Rs with women in his life. He gets hurt so he cuts them off. Fast forward to today: he saw his D18 for the first time in 3 years a couple months ago, and they communicate almost daily. He also sends her money, which is what his feelings got hurt by in the beginning.
My IC said this is HUGE for him. It took an amazing amount of courage and humility for him to work back into her life. He's having to come to terms with how he damaged that R as her father. He is actively trying to repair that R.
Why I'm bringing it up. LOL! IC also said it is very common for men to only be able to handle one thing at a time. Women are multi-taskers, men are not. Especially when it comes to emotions, etc.
Maybe, He needs to work on and experience success with others before he can work on his R with you. Do not take it personally. See it as a positive sign.
Me: 39 H: 45 Second marriage for both H left 12/2013 M:4 T:5.5
IC also said it is very common for men to only be able to handle one thing at a time. Women are multi-taskers, men are not. Especially when it comes to emotions, etc. 