Well I think you could talk to a lawyer and they could possibly set up some sort of temporary child support through the courts. How and what the process is called varies a bit by where you live. Would require some research.
Or, maybe you try to sit down and have one conversation about a 'budget' or allowance? Then, once that is set up, possibly it happens automatically and next time you talk the subject would be different.
me 41 w43 married 20 years BD 10/10/13 ILYBNILWY.... 4 kids, 21,18,8,6
IMHO perhaps it would be best to check with H and set up a system of putting money in a joint account for running the house. If he won't agree its best to ask a L for advice on how to accomplish this.
me: 47, W:49 M 16.5 years T 17 years Three kids - D17,D14, S13 Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13 Bomb drop 11/29/13 W moved out 12/5/13 I Retained L 2/20/14 D filed 3/17/14
Both accounts we have are joint accounts. I have passwords to one and checks to both, he has passwords to the other. We did it this way when he was overseas so he could pay off bills and such. He continues to pay the mortgage and a few other bills from one account and transfers money to "my" account to take care of the household. It has worked out well. When I need additional $$ for things he transfers me additional money. My issue right now is not that he won't give me the $$ needed. It's more about me wanting to approach the subject differently. Maybe there isn't a different way. I guess just wanting to 180 how I handle the situation a little bit.
J
Me-44 (45) H- 50 (51) M-'96
S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)
BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas) home Oct(sep rooms) (EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed) insists wants D through July 2015 no more talk of D since
Talked to H last night,no problem with the additional bills. Although his walls are still up very high we did talk a little bit about "nothing." Up until now it's been talk about what we needed to talk about and hang up. So that was positive. And I was the one who ended the conversation. Of course I did text him a little bit later because I was thinking about something he said. Just small talk stuff.
Here is something that struck a chord tho, maybe I'm over thinking it as usual. He hasn't been feeling well since last fall, better than he was but had gone to the Dr and run some tests while he was home (one of the bills). When I asked him how he's feeling he said "feeling real good." Now, I know this is a good thing but I feel like it was almost I feel good now this burden (me)has been lifted. OR it doesn't matter how he's feeling he's going to tell me he's feeling good anyway.
These are the small things I waste my time thinking about, it could just mean he's feeling good and nothing more....ugh!
Me-44 (45) H- 50 (51) M-'96
S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)
BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas) home Oct(sep rooms) (EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed) insists wants D through July 2015 no more talk of D since
I wouldn't read too much in to it. It could just be an automatic response (I always tell people outside of my immediate circle I'm doing great, regardless). Or, maybe he doesn't feel well, but he's not going admit it to you. Or, he really does feel well.
Please don't focus on it. Worry about how you feel.
Me: 39 H: 45 Second marriage for both H left 12/2013 M:4 T:5.5
