Afraid I have waited too long

[ye21]

Ok here is a tough one but I believe this is what you need to hear.
I am not a financial advisor....and I am going to direct my responses towards your well being not financial stuff. Ready?

I was going to answer all those questions but then I decided to take a different approach, please let me know and correct me if I am getting you wrong...
Basically all those questions are Fear (FALSE EVIDENCE APPEARING REAL) you are in the same spot that you were a couple of weeks ago, to give you an example, do you see in the horror movies that the guy walks on the tips of his toes to avoid being discovered by the ghost and then suddenly BAAAAAM the ghost shows up right on his face and he freaks out? Well you are doing the same, D its the ghost, for 2 weeks you had walked like that so the beast would not wake up, but now the beast its awake so you try to find solutions to your fears as fast as you can...

You have been paying for everything, you had even pay for your W lawyer to D or at least to ask him questions about how she can proceed...
You are in panick, and its time to show your real you, not the scared one but the real you, now, the only financial responsabilites you have are your kids and your own expenses, you dont have to pay her expenses, she has no money? Out of your business, she is an adult and she can work right? Unless I am missing something...
You pay for your kids and for your part of the expenses and she has to find a way to be responsable of her side, what consequences can she face if you are acting like a sugar daddy?
Your self steem its low and probably this is the way you think she will be with you, let me tell you something...its not working, she is contacting a lawyer, its time to try a different approach, time for her to be responsible and find a job, no negotiation here.

When she sees that you do this movement she might get really upset...out of your business.

You guys have no relationship right now and either you accept that or this might put you in troubles.

You can seat down with her and tell her that you are stopping paying for her expenses, thats all nothing else.
She might get really upset and attack you verbally or whatever, you respond calmly: I understand how you feel. (Validation and stfu)

You will be showing yourself as a guy ready to move on, that doesnt get scared and thats it.

Its important that you understand that you are not being cruel or anything like that, you are just taking care of yourself, and you want a W who takes care of herself....
Maybe your fear will tell you, but if I stop paying she will D me....now you are paying and she is doing it....so nothing its changing, the thing is that you dont want her to "stay" with you because you pay and then her entire life being resentfull at you, you want her to stay because she loves you.... And this is basically showing yourself as strong and ready to move on and take care of yourself...you are not scared anymore, she wants D? Fine but you are not paying for her "wants" let her find a way to make money, in the long term you both will appreciate that.