wh - I gradually taught my kids to take care of themselves, and when they went away to school they were soooo grateful, and their wives/gfs are too. In fact my eldest son met a lot of girls because he could iron!
In an ideal world your h would do this stuff, but his head is somewhere else, as you know! So why not show your son how to do laundry? It will solve the problem without conflict, and give your son a life-skill. Also you know exactly how that machine works.
