Paul, that's exactly what my H did. After he left, he told me he was "the happiest he had ever been in his life" and definitely wanted a D. So I filed and now I am the devil.
I don't know, I think it's a combo of (a) losing the control he thought he had; (b) not getting the fantasy D he imagined, and (c) having a reason to paint himself as the victim and me the villain once again.
Think about it. As an LBS, I can guarantee you that a large part of the hurt comes from being rejected and having no control of the situation. Someone else making big life decisions and you having no say. Well, imagine if you are the WAS. You are in control, feeling good, you can just kick your spouse around and he/she takes it. Then one day, YOU are getting rejected. YOU have lost control. It must feel like crap.
Not that I feel sorry for your W or my H. Just my take on the backwards ass mind of a WAS.
I'm sorry your W is being a pain. You've already stated your piece. Now just ignore any further attempts to push your buttons.
I agree. I answered her texts about "custody" being part of this...of course it is...we have 3 kids under 18. the state's not going to let us file and not say who they end up with....I told her as of today, not much really changed from what we've been doing, I just put it on paper. the kids use my house as hoe base and visit W when they wish and she wants. the only difference is now, at some point, the finances won't be comingled anymore and we'll actually be doing other things. She actually got annoyed that it stated she lives at her parents....she does, she sleeps and eats there and hasn't come home since December. its where she LIVES uggghhhhhh
me: 47, W:49 M 16.5 years T 17 years Three kids - D17,D14, S13 Heart 2 heart about M 11/8/13 Bomb drop 11/29/13 W moved out 12/5/13 I Retained L 2/20/14 D filed 3/17/14