Then on the other hand, some happiness, some relief, some starting to look forward to it. <--- This surprised me.
I'm not surprised in the least, T2. I think it's normal considering what you've been through.
I will say that it won't seem "real" to you until she either comes back or goes away completely and you can repaint/redecorate any way you want.
I suggest you consider redecorating some anyway. It can be changed if she decides to come back. And you decide to let her.
Peace!
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
