Feeling sad today and missing my H. I'm sadder because I think it's clear he does not miss me. I feel myself going on that downward spiral, this usually happens because I stop seeing any hope of reconciling our M.

I've been listening to some podcasts on another site and 3 things that I try to remember are this: You have to believe you will save your M. Two reasons you won't save it is if you decide you don't want to or you give up trying.

I am going to try to stay positive and stop negative thoughts about an OW. I am going to go for a walk, and then back to Home Depot to get more paint samples. I'm trying to pick a color and always have such a hard time making a decision. Grrr! But I will stay busy and productive. That is my goal for today.

J

Me-44 (45)
H- 50 (51)
M-'96

S-18(20)D-15(17)D-12(14)

BD Feb 2014 (he works overseas)
home Oct(sep rooms)
(EAs possible Pa's unconfirmed)
insists wants D through July 2015
no more talk of D since