keep_going, I'm looking at this as an opportunity to make myself the best version of me I can, sounds corny but it's true. In time anything is possible so I'm not giving up hope, I'm just not dwelling on a R any longer.
gabbysmom, the custody issue is number one right now as far as my W and I are concerned. Depending on how that goes it may be a major obstacle to a good relationship between my W and I. I can't let that effect my decisions when it comes to my kids though.
Wonka, I think I'm actually looking and feeling better than I have in years. I've lost about 15 pounds of flab and gained that back in muscle, it feels awesome! I've been working out nearly every day so the changes are pretty obvious. I do try to look my best even if it's only been my MIL that I see when I pick up the kids. I pick the kids up at a coffee shop or at the hotel I'm staying at so far, no visits to the in-laws to this point. I still see my W as a scared deer, she's hiding from me for whatever reason. In time, if she would be willing to see me and maybe chat I think she'd be blown away by the changes I've made.
Me-40,W-37 D7, D5, S3 Separated Oct 3/2013 T 11 YRS M 7 YRS
My W's bday is next week. I feel the right thing to do is to help my kids get her a card and I am going to purchase a gift that they can give her as well.
She loves reading so would an ereader be out of line?
My kids and I have always shopped together for gifts for their Mom so I think it's important to keep up that tradition.
Me-40,W-37 D7, D5, S3 Separated Oct 3/2013 T 11 YRS M 7 YRS
How about letting the kids pick out the gift for their Mommy? I wouldn't get W an e-reader. How about picking a book that will generate a positive memory for W? What are her favorite genres?
unbidden, it's funny you mention that. My W DID read those books last summer. I'd thought maybe that she was missing something in the bedroom but she said at the time it just gave her more ideas for us. She also told me I reminded her of the Mr Grey character... didn't know what to make of that at the time and I still don't.
Me-40,W-37 D7, D5, S3 Separated Oct 3/2013 T 11 YRS M 7 YRS
Actually, the books get a lot of press because of the whole S & M angle but it's actually very limited. It turns out that it's a really incredible (as in far-fetched) love story that women really get into. That's why it's so popular, more for the love and the great sex that these in-love characters have together than for extreme bondage. The female version of porn. You must be cute if she compares you to him
Well, I think my W thought I was cute Not sure if she still thinks that. I'm guessing though that she was more talking about our sex life, it was pretty intense, maybe too much at times for her.
Me-40,W-37 D7, D5, S3 Separated Oct 3/2013 T 11 YRS M 7 YRS
kidding