before I came home last night, stopped off at meijer and bought my W this little easter chic that lights up the rubber gooy kind.
I came home, went into the bedroom and told her, Wife, I brought home this chic and she is lonely, I said your not mad she says no in a odd voice like what is he talking about, I then said she will give you good company and fun, I then said her she is I give it to her flashing she starts laughing saying to me your your funny and where did you get this, still laughing, she said thank you, she even said the last time you gave me a farm animal I ended up marrying you. On our first date I told her a friend of mine was stopping up and she got real concerned, I let this go on for about an hour and then I made her look the other way and said oh her he is and put pig pez candy dispencer on the table and she looked and just laughed and told me that was sweet etc.. the rest is history.
I then gave her a back massage and she let me touch her back butt massaging it, with out a problem and this has been going on this whole time she dropped the bomb. When I was done she tells me Thank you and you can sleep in the bed tonight for giving me a massage, I actually laughed and I mean I thought it was funny and I told her I always appreciated when she makes me laugh. I wasnt laughing at her I truly thought it was funny.
About an hour goes by and she seems to be tossing and turning, so she got up and went to sleep in the other room, Not sure what to make of that.
I use leave her little notes around the house put them in her car etc.. and yes that stuff faded as we got busy with kids work etc. I took her for granted by not being there for her, emotionally and I'm know I just did't just listen to her, I know I try to fix it for her, I drank to much, I just need to be a better person and stop being selfish, I really know what I have done wrong in this M, even When it was happening, I just felt like zi will never make he happy, so I withdrew myself at times, and then I would do nice things for her and she wouldsee it, and then pattern would start over, so now I know why she is afraid of my changes.
I do notice when I pulled yesterday she was blowing my phone up, but when I give her attention she takes it. so if i withdrew in the M and if I withdraw now isnt that more of the same? and if I do what I did last night isn't that pressuring persuing?
