Thought i'd best start a new thread seen as my others in danger of being locked.
Brief summary:
Aug 2013 - Asked H to leave due to addictions. Oct 2013 - H went into rehab & got clean. Jan 2013 - BD by H and he needed "space". Feb 2013 - Found out about EA, developed into sex a couple of times. Mar 2013 - He's ended A with OW?
H has said I'm everything he wants in a wife, he enjoys spending time with me and wants me as a big part of his life but doesn't feel love for me & wont come back until he does. He also fully admits that he doesn't know what love is and that he won't allow himself to feel love as it makes him vulnerable.... Last week he said that he wants to be a family and be with me but his fears are stopping him & that he's scared of things going back to how they were. We had a very good relationship before his addictions became a problem & we still have a deep connection & get on really well.
Been DB and making progress - decided last week to go NC for a while & set some healthy boundaries (big 180 for me!), H said he didn't want this and that he wanted to stay in contact but I've been strong and stuck with it, he's been perusing me & saying he misses me a lot. Since I "let go" of him & our marriage he's been forced to face up to the reality of his decisions and said he is struggling.
NC, GAL & 180 have helped me get into a much stronger place and feel much more confident - I know now that either way i'll be alright and although I would love to save my marriage I know that if that doesn't happen then I can still be happy.
Divorce Final: Oct 2014
Your struggles today, develop strength for tomorrow...
