My husband is a self-absorbed person who is clearly devoid of empathy. He has difficulty making emotional bonds, not just with me, but also with his own family. His relationships exist at very superfluous levels. All his conversations are focused on non-personal matters, such as investment, finance, real estate etc.
Let me illustrate this with an example: I confronted him regards his porn addiction and told him how deeply it hurts me. Instead of offering a gentle apology (even a fake apology would have helped), he turned around and told me that I am stupid as I don't understand his evolutionary need to "F**K" and spread his seed amongst as many beautiful women as he possibly can. He said that he has no control over this urge and its a natural behavior for me. Needless to say, I felt completely humiliated. I look at this incident as emotional abuse, because that's how it made me feel. Any action or word which hurts one's spouse in a very personal way, is abuse. Period.
His porn addiction caused erectile dysfunction. On the rare occasion when he tried being intimate with me, he was unable to get an erection. I felt sad and undesired. This has been a constant in our marriage.
