Keep in mind that he might have the same goal but how he sees it may look very different. His view of the world is probably going to be different because his perspective is different. Doesn't mean it's wrong, just different and perhaps not as well-informed because you have been the primary care-taker.
Funny story-when our kids were small, H worked days and so I worked evenings. To this day he knows more about their favorite dinners than I do because he did a lot more dinners than I did. I will sometimes say to one or the other of the sons, "I didn't know you liked that," and I'll get a confused look back with "MOM! I love that."
So my perspective was very different from my H's. My knowledge of "favorite dinners" was very different from my H's.
You have your truth, your H has his, neither has to be wrong. His is just as real to him as yours is to you. It's what you each see from your vantage point with the limited knowledge you both have.
When you can relax away from the black-white, you can begin to realize that the truth is usually somewhere in the middle.
One last thought, take these counseling sessions one at a time. You've already jumped way into the future on what might happen.
What is your biggest fear about the counseling?
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
