Barrybran IV - Three Years Forward, 30 Years Back

[Barrybran]

You'd think I'd learn to have no expectations by now. I thought my wife would be staying somewhere else tonight but low and behold, she's here at home and going nowhere. We're hanging out in different rooms though. I'm watching football and hemming my workpants while she's doing whatever she wants to do.

I had an awkward moment tonight. My kids were still at home when my wife called asking if I'd organised anything for dinner. Not knowing what she was doing and expecting the kids to be gone I'd held off. My wife is free to do what she likes but I can't just cook for myself. It's rude and discourteous in my opinion and whilst she might not like me much at the moment, she's still my wife and she still shares the bills with me. That means I'll still cook for her if I'm cooking for myself. On top of that, I think it would set a poor example to the kids if they see me excluding Mum so I'm jut not going there. Throw the kids in too and I didn't know if I was cooking for 1, 2 or 5.

My wife told me she'd cook and it was just the two of us. I tried to express to her what I wrote above and messed it up. I don't even remember what I said. It was a whole bunch of "umm" and "uhh". My wife told me a few weeks ago to tell her how I feel but I just don't feel I can talk to her right now. I'd love to be able to but every time I do I get attitude and a bag full of 'I'm right'. To my wife's credit, she's been right way more often than I ever gave her credit for but I'd love to have a mature, adult-to-adult conversation about things that are troubling the both of us rather than rudeness and sarcasm. In the end, I just don't bother. I figure if she ever wants to talk she'll let me know. Besides, I'm probably supposed to steer clear of contentious items anyway and stick to the real important stuff. It's pretty confusing at times.

So my weekend has changed slightly. My wife will start the day at home and who knows where she'll wind up. I'll get a sleep in tomorrow having agreed to work tomorrow night instead of tomorrow morning. That will give me an opportunity to go to the gym and get on top of the housework tomorrow morning instead of after work. Sunday will be free for yardwork so here's hoping the weather stays clear.

I hope everyone else is having a far less foggy day