I have been reading and monitoring the boards fpr some time, I have posted on her before.
I truly believe my W is having an affair, She got a new cell phone through her mother and I don't have access to it. on 2/13/14 My w came home announcing she filed for divorce, took her rings off and had the new phone, she stated it was because I was too controling, took her for granted, drank to much and had a strained relationship with her son.
I admitt to all of it. I have completely changed all of these things, My w has noticed and even called me a fantastic man, however to little to late, I have been DB for a little over a month and I have had some really good interactions with W.
W came home one night around 11:30pm usualy gets home around 5:30 and said she workd late however went right into the shower smelled like a weird smoke from a fire place. She didn't work late because I drove to a store near her work and she wasnt there. I confrontedher and simply said if your seeing someoneits not a deal breaker and she said she worked late, I then said well i drove by and you werent there, she then got really defensive and stated now your stalking your wife and she said she was done with the conversatin I did continue she the said she went to a bar with some girls from work. She didnt want me to see hr getting out of the shower and I noticed a really weird scratch on her hip almost like some lines from something, maybe a watch or braclet. she saidi dont't know how it happned. I then let it go. and she became a little nicer towards me. I smelled this same smoke smell on her the aturday before when she said she was at her girlfriends house cleaning from noon to 12:45 am and we got home around the same time she went right into the shower. she never does this. since these to occurences I havent smelled the smoke again.
I believe she has gone into a deeper hiding with it. I did come early from work yesterday around 11pm and heard her laughing in the bedroom, she didn't know I was home and when I went into the room she immediately had herphone under the covers hitting buttons to end the call, she asked your home early and I said what are you laughing at and she said what, i said what are you doingwith your phone, she said I was talking with GF, I said you just hung up on and never said bye, yes I did in a angry voice. I again told her this is not adeal breaker and asked again she got real defensive. I changed the subjectreal fast and of course she calmed down, this is common when someone lies, the focus comes off andthey follow the new question, a person not lying would go back to the original question. weended up in an argument with her blaming me for all my wrong doings and I agreed with her, and told her I was sorry etc... See she won't admit it and puts blame on me. I know when she talks with him she aks really nice to me for that day etc..
I think I blew all my chances with getting back with her, I think this argument pushed her right into his arms. See w wants me to keep quit and not tell anyone about our divorce pending. I only have maybe another 6 days to pull this off but she is pushing me for the house equity etc.. so she can get out and be on her own with her son.
I need some expert advice her. I plan to continue DBing, I have done good she even cried one day that it looked like I was fine etc..
I sent her anpology for last night and all my wrong doings and she sent me this "I know you are sorry. I appreciate that you recognize all this...I just wish it didn't take me filing for a divorce to get you there. I accept your apology and I forgive you. I need to so that I can heal. I hope for the best for you."
I sent back I can only pray for us both and let God have his will with this.
a few days ago she was sobbing in my arms and all I did was hold her. She has told me she doesn't trust the changes and fears I will go baack to the way I was.
I was married before and I cheated On my first W, I know how torn I was inside with guilt but all i did was follow my heart, what a bad move that was then. Its Jerimieh 17:9 "the heart is more deceitful than anything else, and it will pursue what feels right at the moment"
She told me last night that she will have to call her lawyer and tell him that I'm harrasing her. Because I asked if she's having an affair.
