Need help saving my family - part 6

[melissag]

I know you have already gotten a lot of advice on this matter, but I'll throw in my $.02 anyway.

First off, I agree with Mach 1 here ^^^. It sure does seem that you are afraid of your W. What's up with that? Is it just wanting to preserve the possibility of R?

I think that agreeing to move to W's province right off the bat is a bad idea. Your W had no business taking the kids four hours away from their neighborhood, their friends, their house, their school, and most importantly, their father. What did your L say about this? I guess I am not sure what your L has said about much of anything, legally speaking. Maybe I missed it - what are the odds a court would compel your W to move back to your province? What are the odds a court will give you 50/50 physical custody? What factors does a court look at when deciding custody issues?

I think that giving something up right off the bat during negotiations is almost always a bad idea, when dealing with someone controlling and unyielding as your W. It's fine if it's something you don't care much about, but something as big as selling your home and moving four hours away seems kind of big to me.

I don't think you need to answer any of your W's questions. She is not in charge of making decisions. I don't understand why you are letting her be in charge. I think that you will get nowhere unless/until you are on a level playing field. Why don't you ask her some questions? W, are you planning to live with your parents forever? What are your plans to move to a neighborhood that is safer for our children? Etc.

Do you like your lawyer? It sounds to me like she is not a very good negotiator, and she doesn't respond to you in a timely fashion. You may be working with your L a whole lot for a long while (I have a friend who was D 15 years ago and still uses his L for D issues that invariably come up each year.) So make sure you are 1000% comfortable with her.