Well, at least at this point you know your mistakes. We all make them early on. I can't say that I did anything right in the first two months either. Have you read the DR book yet? This helped me get a grip on the situation, like it does many of us. Start working on detaching and GAL. With tensions this high you are likely to get many jabs meant to draw you into arguments.
I'm guessing when you said W quit her job and took the kids that she had a fallout with OM because you told his W? Do you know how that played out? Definitely stop searching into FB and other portals into what has happened if you are doing it if you are trying to work things out. You will only find hurtful things there whether she means them or not they will not help 'you'. Also, I would not keep talking to family members about where she stands and / or the mistake she is making. I did this too and even 5 months in all it has accomplished is pushing W further from me and from those family members that might agree with you.
Welcome to the board and good luck.
M: 43 W: 43 Married 6 yrs. T: 7 yrs. Son 20, 18, 17, 15 yrs. (w/ Autism), 12, 10
