Upwards - DB myself to happiness!

[Upwards]

Mimi00 - thanks I intend to do just that having my nails done today & going to spend some time thinking about where I want MY life to go.

gogofo - thank you, I hope your talk is productive but don't give up if it's not as we've had many unproductive ones and it's just because H wasn't ready or in the right place, frustrating that's it's all about them though but unfortunately it is.
I'm nervous today after thinking about everything, when he left I felt positive but now I've had chance to panic & anxiety is creeping in. Not spoken to him since so no idea how he felt it went either but he did say he needed to think about everything so I don't want to pressure him at all.