I don't know what all was said in the discussion the two of you had. Did she ask you to do the work b/c she was too unstable? Did she say she was incapable of knowing how to find help, or did you volunteer?

I don't think you give her enough credit. You still want to rescue and help her like she's physically or mentally challenged. She is a big girl and should have been wearing her big girl panties a long time ago, but why should she when you are so willing to clean up behind her.

Your post said she wanted to find a group to help her learn how to forgive, let go, and love again. But did she say to love "you" again? And she already has her girlfriends as a group. None of them could make a suggestion.......if she were to ask for help?

She mentioned how devasted her family is that she wants a divorce.

The things in your post sound, to me, like you were asking her questions in that discussion, and those were the type of answers you were getting from her.

You said she also agreed to attend Retro'ville in May. Did that subject come up in the discussion, or had she agreed to it previously? And are you saying you want to find something in addition for her?


It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!