Paul.. this is certainly a process and you are still only at the beginning of your journey. I think one way we can look at success is to really examine the changes we have made in ourselves. Were these things we just did as a reaction to BD or have we really internalized. It is wonderful that you were able to recognize a negative response to your new friend being busy and put a stop to it.
Me 44 H 42 M 10 T 12 (at time of BD) Ss 20 16 S11 (special needs)
BD 9/13 H "unhappy for years" moves to seperate bedroom 10/13 EA/PA confirmed but denied S and I move out 3/15