I would like to address you posts from the perspective as a child of divorce (twice...who's counting!).
one day one of your kids might approach you and say:
Dad why you fought mom like that? Why you changed locks and treat her like that? Why you did that to yourself if months earlier you loved her? Why you did that instead of just accepting her the way she was? Why were you so obsessed in being "right"? Dont you see that no matter what, we carry your blood and we will always love you even if we weren't with you? Nobody could replace our biological father...
Honestly, I've NEVER once asked either of my parents who filed first and who fought the hardest. That never ever crossed my mind at all. In my world view as a child, the following things were uppermost in my mind:
1) Both of my parents LOVE me 2) Both of my parents get along in co-parenting 3) Still being able to see & visit w/both my mother and father 4) Still being able to visit and play with my sisters 5) Having roof over my head, clothes, have food on the table 6) NUMBER ONE: No badmouthing from one parent to me about the other. And to their credit, none of them did.
The filing, custody arrangements, etc is STRICTLY for the adults to figure out between them. Be sure that those issues don't bleed into the children's space.
or what I see in your posts you guys seem very happy about it, this is a forum to save your M not to advice a person to fill for D and go into war...
You seem to imply that they're in the wrong for filing D which is insane to begin with! They would MUCH rather save their M. Filing for D is something that all of DBers need to do in order to protect their families and finances. Nobody is happy to file for D. Who is??!!!
My advice here will always be directed to improve the person/point towards Reconciliation....
