I can attest to the fact that staying out of W's way and not pursuing is the way to go when W going through this period of her life/divorce process. Early in the evening I raised the idea of attending RetroV, she said she would have to look into before agreeing to go and then again mentioned how she doubts I will "change and stay changed". But that went ok and at least she was somewhat receptive to it. I may bring it up in another week if things are going ok ...but then this happened...
W was going out for the evening and I was going out too but she asked me if I could be home by 11pm because thats the latest sitter could stay. I texted W at 10pm to let her know I was home. She did not respond to my text. Later that night W calls and left me a voice mail that her phone was again acting up and to call her on her friends phone if I needed to reach her and left me the number. I assumed the number was the one that was on caller ID so I rang it back to let her know I got her VM, kids went to bed ok, that I was now home and sent babysitter home, etc. But no answer. I later looked up her friend's number on my phone contacts because I had deleted her VM and called and got ahold of her. Only spoke a few words mainly that i couldnt reach her at the number she called from, i deleted her VM but got her friends number from my contacts and was just calling to know i could get ahold of her should anything happen and to let her know I was home. 30 second call. I went to bed. Heard W come in just after 2am. In hindsight, I should not have even bothered letting her know I was home and everything was good. This morning she went on major rant on how i could even think to call her friend's phone, what was I doing trying to "check up on her", nothing has changed ...you're so controlling ...i know why I want this divorce ...blah blah blah.
Do I explain to her after work today and when she has calmed down that I just wanted her to know i was home and relieved sitter and wanted to be sure I had the right phone number should anything have happened ....or just drop it all together? As I think back on this, in the past she used to call, text whatever to be sure I was home on time for the sitter. So my focus was to let her know that, but obviously now she didnt care about that. I should have just let her get ahold of me like she always has if it had concerned her that much. This whole fiasco has me upset ...what to do?
Me: 47 Her: 45 M 18 years T 22 years S-6 D-9 Separate rooms 1/5/14 Wife filed for divorce 2/5/14
