I am just so sad. I can't shake it. This is really happening. I am trying so hard to be brave and strong and keep it together. 'Ill be ok'. But I just don't to feel it anymore. I guess I've been hoping something will happen and he will miss us, miss me. He will come home and be prepared to work at it. But it most probably isn't going to happen and I need to get used to the idea of being a single mum of 3. That mine and their futures will be totally different.
