I just reread the rules, and I agree, there is nothing in there that precludes a more aggressive approach.
I had thought of them as passive, but as you suggest, I likely picked that up from reading posts, rather than reading the rules.
I may also have been interpreting "give them space" as "Don't pressure them." I think a more aggressive approach would definitely pressure them. "Don't pressure them" is not on the list.
I agree W has to realize she has lost something to end A.
Quote:
As I said in the other thread, I believe the LBH should have a plan of action. Reacting on an emotional impulse, or doing something to get a response from the WAW....is not a plan of action. He needs to know what is most important, list his priorities, secure his finances, seek legal counsel, and protect himself and his children. Those are just the first items that come to mind. But that's what I mean by having some plan of action. A man should know what he can't live without, and won't he won't live with.
Personally, my finances are secure (complaint was she never had access to them), legal counsel has been sought, children are fine.
I'll really have to give more thought to a plan of action and my limits.
I would like her to leave the marital bed as long as A is on. That may seem petty or controlling, but to me it is hugely symbolic; that bed belongs to me and my wife, not OM's mistress, and it would be something that would be completely in her control to remedy, and a daily reminder of her choice.
Legally I can't stop supporting her, and I don't want her out of the house away from the kids during all this, but I don't have to have her in my bed, listening to endless Adele misery songs all night.
