When to Give Up?

[ye21]

Ok you want to be happy and free....now you are free, not happy but free....all of us come here asking the same, what can I do, why that? And so on with thousand questions....some even develop a career and become the best investigators ever, we have a few Sherlock Holmes here....did that brought them peace or their spouses back? Nop but it made the whole situation worst.

You cant see this but I can and thats why I will bring you to reality... You are not together, now he is doing his life and you feel guilty for living yours maybe because you think its "bad" to feel happy and have a new life if you havent exhausted first all the possibilities of Reconciliation....well thats what most of us do, then clarity replace all that, we accept things the way THEY ARE NOW, and move on without expectations....in the proccess we follow rules that will help us to achieve this state of mind (Sandi rules)

Why they do what they do? No f clue, they just do it and there is nothing we can do to change what they do, but we can change how we react to what they do...
He rings you and text you? Ok fine, let him do that, dont answer, evenctually he will understand and stop doing that.

The title of your sitch its when to give up? Now if you want...there is no time for that, time its that just time, whatever you think today it might be different tomorrow... All the responses are inside you, dont look for answers they will come when you are ready to receive them, this sounds very romantic but its just like that.

We have no idea what he thinks, and this website its to save yourself, once you save yourself, your mrriage can be saved, you are not gonna save yourself in a week but you will ending saving yourself if you want...that is called TAKING ACTION, and every action has a consecuence, if you take those actions he might or not come back but yourself will definetly come back, thats for sure.

I keep repeating the importance of accepting the things the way they are now and this is crutial if you want to have a chance of reconciliation, if you cant accept you cant reconcile, its so simple as that.

I did parties, hang out with many girls, hurt some feelings, dissapointed my parents and many things that form the picture of who I am right now, I am 34 and up till not too long ago I kept telling myself how bad was all that, today I think that there is no good or bad, I did it because at that point thats what I knew and didnt knew any different, would I do that today? Its not really what calls my attention so nop I would not do that, do I regret? Hell no, otherways I would not be in the point that I am now in my life!
The things I did teach me many lessons and I have learned from all of them, you cant run from your feelings, they will go to sleep but they will wake up one day stronger.
Whatever he is doing, its his and only his responsability to one day look at himself and say, am I happy? If he founds out he is not, he will checkout how to improve his happiness and then he might call you back or not we just dont know, but its fine to not know...
So let him live his life, do things one way or another, I know that you dont like that idea, you want him to experience all those things with you, but he is choosing not to do it and all you can do its respect and accept that....
Some people come back after weeks, month years and some others they never come back, is that your responsability or fault? No, thats why also many spouses leave when everything its just fine, they just need that in that instant and all we can do its accept and respect, if once they decide to come back then we will have a different conversation but now thats all you have to focus on, sandi rules and yourself...why are you avoiding that?