I've also been thinking about one of the things my H has said multiple times. He doesn't see D as final. He thinks that it's likely that we'll end up together again. BUT, he thinks we first have to start over as just friends and really work on building our friendship and then see what happens. It's hard for me to reconcile that with the fact the he repeatedly tells me that I'm his best friend, but I get the impression that the WAS isn't usually a rational being. He has said that he doesn't see our problems as solvable without D.
That sure sounds familiar! My H has also said that maybe he just needs D to see what he'd be missing and that it'd be possible for us to get back together. He doesn't seem to get that after going through all of that emotional and financial pain that that may not be an option for me. We've broken up and gotten back together several times over the past 10+ years (all before we were married) and because we were young and silly, I guess, we never actually worked through any of that in any organized way. I do find myself wondering if I've made myself to be the "Plan B" all of these times, so H thinks he can keep going off to "see what's out there" knowing I'll always be here as a safety net when or if it doesn't work out.
Me:30 H:29, no kids T:12, M:4 (when D was final) 12/13: "Don't think I want to be M anymore" 6/14: Separated (I move) 1/15: H filed for D 5/15: D final
My H has also said that maybe he just needs D to see what he'd be missing and that it'd be possible for us to get back together. He doesn't seem to get that after going through all of that emotional and financial pain that that may not be an option for me. We've broken up and gotten back together several times over the past 10+ years (all before we were married) and because we were young and silly, I guess, we never actually worked through any of that in any organized way. I do find myself wondering if I've made myself to be the "Plan B" all of these times, so H thinks he can keep going off to "see what's out there" knowing I'll always be here as a safety net when or if it doesn't work out.