First of all let's just say it out loud so that you can acknowledge the truth, you and your sons are victims of abuse by your H. What he did to all of you is unacceptable. You were absolutely right in demanding that he go to anger management, and his refusal to do so tells me he is in denial of his condition as an abuser. I suspect that he has always been this way (most abusers are like that their entire lives) and had been suppressing it in the early years of your M. Make no mistake about it, he is DANGEROUS. Abuse does not get better over time, it always gets worse unless they seek professional help, and unfortunately they rarely do because they convince themselves their behavior is everyone else's fault.
Quote:
I told him I was still sad and lonely and wanted him back even though I was getting on with my life.
Don't tell him things like that, it just makes it look like you're waiting around as plan B for him. Are you familiar with Sandi2's 37 Rules?
Quote:
so I asked him "is that forever then? No possibilities of you coming back to find me in a few months, like you previously said? "
Don't ask things like this either. The answer you get today will be different than tomorrow will be different than next week. WAS's are not thinking clearly and logically, they're acting off of raw emotions. The things they do and say often don't make sense and aren't consistent.
Quote:
I am starting to see how badly he has treated me and I'm not sure I want any more of that. Primarily because he is unaware of his bad behaviour and blames it all on me, so no hope of improving it.
