I wonder if he realizes that one of these days, I am just going to stop answering because this is just too weird,
You could always try this ^^^ now. Maybe you end up with a different result.
I don't answer every text, so at this point I think the result would be the same - either that or no more texts at all.
Originally Posted By: ericmsant2
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I wonder if I am not sending out a wrong message by continuing to answer his texts.
Good question to ponder...or is it? What if you respond, what is he going to think, what if you do not respond, what is he going to think? Hmm....sounds like you can go round and round with this one - almost like a hamster wheel.
I guess I could, but I was really just wondering from a curious point of view. WE are taught to not have expectations, but the MLCer is not and has a rather warped view of the world. I find it curious, in his mind - are we friends?
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I don't want all my thoughts of Skippy to go away.
IMO, they never really do. Making a stance for you, is not going to erase the good times. [/quote]
I am not sure what you mean by "making a stance for me". In any event, I don't expect the memories to go away. After 18 years, some are bound to stick.
Originally Posted By: ericmsant2
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although that sometimes smacks of hypocrisy to me since I am still so angry at how he treated me.
Why then do you still respond - even if it is short? What is the worse that could happen?
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I can reply and my replies don't "mean" anything either.
Can you honestly say that? Maybe I am wrong...i just think that deep down inside they do mean something.
Why do I respond? Because it seems impolite to ignore anyone (never held a grudge in my life) and it seems passive agressive. If I am not responding because I truly want to slam that door shut on everything, I believe in saying so explicitly. I am interested to see how all of this plays out, so when I get asked a question, I answer. It's only a text.
Eric, what do you think my responses "mean"? To him? To me? I am a little too long in the tooth at this to still believe that my "yes, I did get my car out of the snow bank" has any deeper meaning other than I didn't have to resort to the bus.
Originally Posted By: ericmsant2
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I guess there is a part of me which really does not want him to think that everything's OK - look GF or new GF, everything is fine between us, I am not that bad, she is cool with everything.
Because I am not.
Then why not tell him?
Maybe. It might be fun to scream at him for a while and make him squirm. But the reality is that we are now 1000 miles apart and perfectly independent of each other and the most "contacting at a whim" that I get bothered with is a random text less than once a month. I do not contact him and to do so that I can open up the blood-letting is drastically unappealing to me. Because likely he knows that I am angry but like everything else, has lied about it to others. No talk is going to fix that.
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Wonka makes a good point about working through the anger piece by piece....maybe the piece that is missing is the one where you really let him know how you feel. When you really tell him that it is NO LONGER okay for HIM to contact you at the whim, that YOU deserve better than that. Mabye it is time for PORTIA to take HER POWER back. I dunno...you know best Portia. Me...I choose to never get on the hamster wheel..not for her...for Me.
What do you see as taking my power back?
Originally Posted By: ericmsant2
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I would not mind a weekend at the spa too
I totally recomend the spa day! Hell I think I am gonna book mine right now.
