Need help saving my family - part 4

[Wonka]

Nope, neyt, non! Zip it about the "move."

You can say this:

As for the children's birthdays, we could either organize them and celebrate together with them as it would be easier in terms of presents and travel time. The other option is we can have a party for each one of them separately such as one at your place and then I'll have them a few days to celebrate their birthdays with me. I am fine with either one of these options and can be flexible on this one.

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This is your first real communication with W so you don't want to spook her right off bat with "moving" to her area or whatever you call it.

[Scorp7]

I agree but I don't see how we could split time with the kids unless I'm there? For the kids to be with me half the time they need to be in their usual school. Since I'm four hours away right now there is not way we could split time if I stay where I am.

Are you saying I should just say "I propose that we alternate weeks with the children, as it is important for them to have equal time with both parents." and let her fill in the blank about me needing to be there?

[Wonka]

I think it would be helpful to offer these birthday options to W and see what she has to say about it. She may have some other ideas that you hadn't thought of at all.

If I were you, I'd go ahead and finalize the draft with the suggested changes. Then if all looks good, then you get the green light to hit the "send" button!

[Scorp7]

Hi W, thanks for giving me some time before responding to your last email.

Thanks for letting me know about D6's immunizations. I agree that it is a good idea for her to have them done and having them done at the private clinic is likely best.

Great to hear that the RESP is getting setup for S2.

As you know, I need to focus on my mother right now as she is very ill. Her doctors tried chemo again but it didn't work this time. However, I do think it is important that we address the parenting time issue.

I propose that we alternate weeks with the children, as it is important for them to have equal time with both parents. (I don't see how she will agree to this since she will wonder how this is possible from 4 hours away)

In the event one of us was unable to care for the kids during the time they were with us the other parent would be the first option to care for the kids. For example, if you needed to be away for work or some other event and could not care for the kids during that time then the kids would be with me.

For birthdays and other special events can we plan to come together for the kids? Possibly plan them together as well?Otherwise, we could adjust the schedule to ensure that the kids are with one of us for one year and then the other parent the next year. I am fine with either one of these options.

As you would agree, it is important for our children to have equal time with their parents. We both love them to bits! What are your thoughts on this proposed plan?

Thanks,
Scorp
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[Wonka]

Scorp,

(I don't see how she will agree to this since she will wonder how this is possible from 4 hours away)

No mindreading here. Just send that email to W...please don't forget to remove that ^^ part first!

[Scorp7]

Thanks Wonka, I'm going to send that. Lets hope I catch her in a good mood.

[Scorp7]

Well, I received a response from my W. She has completely ignored everything I sent her regarding sharing our kids:

The house is something that needs to be dealt with immediately. I had thought that since you had agreed to have the property valuations completed by the realtors, that you were on board with selling the house & property right away. This can only go one of two ways: one being that the house & property are put up for sale ASAP (priced accordingly for a quick, fair sale); or option two is that you wish to stay in the house and will have to buy me out for my share of the value. Either way, the decision needs to be made right away so that the next step can be taken and we can move on.

I would really like to have your thoughts & decision within the next couple of days.

[Barrybran]

Sounds like a fun person you're dealing with. Step one: wait 48 hours :-)

[Scorp7]

It really feels like she's leaving me no choice but to bring a L into the situation. We both still have full custody of our kids but she's dictating everything with them. Even if I agree to sell our house I don't even know where I would be moving to. I need to be in the same town as my kids to share time with them but there's likely no point moving there unless we agree to 50/50.

[Barrybran]

That's fair enough. Forgetting everything else for a moment, what do you WANT to do with the house? I saw you were asked a few pages back and you mentioned what you could do but not what you want to do.