Also I realise that it was hard for h to go to the party as well because after he left me, he really stopped being invited to a lot of places while I continued to be invited. This party was one of those places (it's an annual party). A lot of people had not seen him in years and a lot of people assumed we were divorced.

So I get that it's hard on h too and a huge step as well. And I get why he would be nervous about walking in with me perhaps. maybe even that's why he seems to have 'suddenly' not stay with us at the home. Was the party too much for him?

It's weird at another level. Being in DB and all I have learned, etc and the way h and I are with each other ( friendly, civil, almost going to a party together, etc) shocks a lot of people. I mean I saw genuine shock on people's faces. Yet it seemed so normal to me to have this relationship with him. It felt comfortable and I suppose society's norm is for us to hate each other and not talk etc. I am so glad I found this place, because I would have been living with a lot of anger if I hadn't.

TPS
Me: 44 H: 42
M14 T17
S10 D7
10/10 H moves out after death of his father-same month
21/04/12 H is 'DONE'
04/05/12 OW/PA confirmed (rumors from 2010)
July '14 H ends affair
May '15 H moves back home