Thank you for your response. While I wouldn't wish this experience on anyone, it helps to know that I'm not alone in this strange place that frequently feels like the Twilight Zone. I'm struck by the similarities shared by so many of the stories on this forum.
I think you're right: I do cognitively understand what I need to do. I get that it is counter-intuitive. I just have a hard time overcoming my instinct to react from an emotional place. Until yesterday, I had actually done really well for two weeks or so. I hadn't mentioned anything and had a great PMA. Then I made the mistake of stepping back onto the roller coaster. Ugh...
I'm trying to identify the things I don't like about myself and work on changing them. I'm working on become a better listener. I think there is a very good chance that my husband didn't actually feel like I heard what he was saying to me a lot of the time.
A lot of my GAL involves my D7. She's so much fun and I love being with her. She and I bake together, walk to the lake to feed the ducks, take trips to the zoo, go to the park, etc. My sister and I are very close and live only a few minutes apart, so she's been a great support for me. I've started going back to church. I hadn't gone for several years and I really missed it. When my D7 is with H, I meet friends for drinks and/or dinner. I have been catching up on lots of books that I had been meaning to read. I also clean to relieve stress, so my floors have never been cleaner
